I know we are always growing and changing. However, I look back on this last year and realize I am a drastically different person than I was even a year ago.
Here are some of the things that have changed:
1. I am now a runner. For anyone who has known me since high school you will realize how against my nature this is. A flat-footed, short-Achilles tendoned, uncoordinated girl has no business running. Yet I do. Three to four times a week averaging 14 miles a week. I have run two 5Ks and one 10K. I love it. I love the 30 minutes it gives me four times a week to just think and do something completely and solely for myself.
2. I am into fashion. For someone who used to joke that I needed to be nominated for TLC's What Not to Wear and would buy most of my clothes at H & M, TJ Maxx, and Target, this is a shock. I wouldn't say I have good fashion sense. But I do have a few friends who have impeccable taste and I have started to take their shopping advice. I have discovered the beauty of the personal shopper at J.Crew and the thrill of fitting into size 8 at the White House Black Market. I love buying shoes at Nordstroms and for the first time in my life have passed over mary janes and flats for a pair of fashion boots, Sperry top-siders, heels and wedges. I love how I feel in nice clothes and love getting dressed in the new outfits I have. I love wearing clothes that are modest, yet still fitted and attractive. In the words of my friend Tai, I have abandoned my Minnesota Mormon style for California Chic. I think I need to re-read Confessions of a Shopaholic. Though I am not anywhere near addicted to shopping, I think I now understand the heroine in that book better than when I first read it.
3. I have lost 40 lbs and kept it off for four months. I have lost this amount of weight before in the past. The only difference is this is the first time I have kept it off and have done it by just living life - no dieting. Just exercising, watching what I eat most of the time, and enjoying the foods I want to enjoy within reason. #1 explains why I have been able to do this and this probably explains why #2 has become such a big part of my life.
4. I am going to grow my hair out. I haven't had long hair since I was in 1st grade. Something inside of me is aching to abandon my sensible, short conservative hair cut and embrace long, sexy locks - even if it requires me taking time to style it every day.
Overall, I feel a new type confidence within me that is blossoming, different from the confidence I have felt before. I have been a capable person for much of my adult life. I am far from perfect but feel I am well-grounded, hard-working, determined and have a firm conviction in my beliefs. This year I have gained a different kind of confidence - a confidence in my physical self. For the first time since I have gotten married I feel beautiful inside and out. Something about this is wholly satisfying to me.
I have a few friends and my sister-in-law to thank for the inspiration that has led me on this journey. You guys know who you are :-). One of the beauties about relationships is the best ones inspire us to be better.
Stream of consciousness from a MN-born, SoCal-living, infertility-surviving, beagle-loving, baby-snuggling, Latter-day Saint believing, patent lawyer hubbie-adoring, opinion-sharing, goal-making woman.
Congratulations! This is so wonderful! You are incredible!
ReplyDeleteYou are so cool. :) I struggle with the idea that I'm an adult....I just don't feel it. I have a bit of an inferiority complex. You're an inspiration! Maybe someday, my brain will grow up! :)
ReplyDeleteoh that all mothers could metamorphasize (is that a verb??) so gracefully! you have surrendered to motherhood but not been utterly consumed by it...it's so important to keep something for yourself & realize that you are also a very important part of the whole equation. you will always be a better mother, wife, friend, sister, etc. when you make time for yourself. I'm completely impressed by your wise insights! I smell a book...XOXO Nancy
ReplyDeleteI love this Kristi! What an inspiration!
ReplyDeleteWay to go, sista! Such an inspiring post. And take it from someone who's had varying lengths of hair over the years -- long takes MUCH less time to style than short. (Plus you always have the 'lazy ponytail' option.)
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