Between trying to set a daily schedule, figure out sleep routines, doing without what I consider to be adequate sleep, figuring out how to get Elisabeth to like her carseat, and all the diapering, feeding, and cuddling that is necessary for raising a baby, I have these small, cherishable moments where I feel an amazing, indescribable connection with my little girl.
Like how my heart swells with excitement while I watch her sleep, imagining all the wonderful things I want to share with her - my testimony of the Savior, my love of good books, my joy of baking, my passion for learning and my enthusiasm for holidays. I cross my fingers she will want to watch Anne of Green Gables with me and be excited to read all of the Little House on the Prairie books with me before bedtime. (As Lance also hopes she will be a big Wii player, an avid Trekkie, and a devout Cougar fan.)
Or how it occurs to me the trust my little baby has with me as she cries out after her nap, knowing her Mama will come to pick her up, give her loves, change her diaper and whatever she will need. Almost like her Mama will always be there for her and she can count on that. She may not know who to vote for in the next election (neither do I, for that matter) or what state she lives in, but Elisabeth knows, with a surety, that I will be there for her when she needs me.
I pray that as she makes the journey through life to create who she is and who she will become, she can take small pieces of myself and her father into her creation. I feel blessed to be allowed to be a part of her journey.
